1319 – Language Lessons with Jimmy Dore
NNF 1319 – Jimmy Dore
@jimmy_dore
www.jimmydorecomedy.com
00 – Hello indeed welcome. Jimmy says indeed because of the theme song! Pardcastathon is next week! Let’s raise at least $55,000! Double nickel! Hagar! Baby is back. Jimmy watched two Kojack’s last night. Neither We nor MeTV are sponsors. Jimmy and Danielle went to a get together and apparently Jimmy was the oldest person there. Hot Toddy is lemon tea, honey, and bourbon. Cider and rum is…cider and rum. Zoe is a Daisy Scout!
05 – Apparently the parents are not all that involved in the scouts. Jimmy is assistant den leader! No one else volunteered so he stepped up. Richie Zisk was #22. Eliot swats his monitor and Jimmy is forced to ask for an explanation.
STILL NO CHAIR! Don’t do the test under threat of rain. Threat of rain use your brain! – Matt and Johnny Cochran. A smart man murders in the rain so the blood washes away.
10 – What is the future of football considering all the head injuries? ChaOS! Jimmy describes players today as animals. Jimmy hates ping pong. He’s not good at it. Jimmy Dore, our guest, is great at it!
15 – Pickle Ball http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pickleball Jimmy does not like sleepy matt. Jimmy doesn’t like it when I go blue. Daisy Chains: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=daisy%20chain. Both Matt’s kids have/had the stomach flu this weekend.
20 – Matt might vomit at any moment. He feels fine but wants to take precautions. Jimmy on the back end of illness but still has a little sore throat action. Matt wonders if Jimmy saw temple clean on HBO about that autistic cattle women who Jimmy said became a janitor. John Waite album is Temple Bar.
25 – Dick Gautier – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dick_Gautier. Hymie on Get Smart. According to Urban Dictionary Schwartza is either derogatory or not. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=schwartza so use good judgment.
Jimmy watched some Abbot and Costello over the weekend.
30 – Dick Gautier Daisy Chain: Cock resting in puss. Once is enough for Jimmy visiting Eliot’s house. Jimmy said Eliot better be distracted by sketching out plans to get his chair into his car to bring to him. Jimmy likes when the Car of the Year is an “everyday car.”
35 – something’s going down with the Tesla.
We’ll be back with Jimmy Dore!
We’re back! Jimmy stayed like a statue.
Port Charles is lovely this time of year!
40 – Frisco is not an asshole! Jimmy thinks they wrote him poorly on his return for the 50th. He’s going through a lot of GH stuff right now. Demi Moore was on GH for 1 year. Jimmy does some Chicago voices! Jimmy D. still finds Chicago to be a beautiful city. They had some rough weather over the weekend. Jimmy lost a friend of the family in the tornado over in Peoria.
45 – Weird to read about someone’s death on facebook, friend of the pardo family. George Zimmerman arrested again. Jimmy tells a story about Jimmy D at Pedro’s and someone called him out on his jon benet set. He handled it great and just moved on. Jimmy D says that happens on his radio show often. JonBenet Ramsey murder was December 25, 1996. Jimmy did not remember the time he was with Jimmy D and they saw Fabio pushing his Mercedes off the road as it stalled.
Celeb sighting with Jimmy and Matt.
50 – Jimmy D is super super excited about Jean Claude Van Damme’s splits stunt. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7FIvfx5J10
We like Van Damme but not Stephen Segall. What about Katy Segall? She’s nice!
55 – No more Sea World for me after seeing blackfish. Jimmy D says don’t mix socks and underwear you could get jock itch!
Athlete’s Foot is worse as an adult than as a teenage. Jimmy D was on propecia for a while. He was getting intense ball pain, apparently because of the propecia. Not fooling around while married is an age thing to Jimmy D.
60 – BTW it seems that the recent Walk of Fame honorees are Jennifer Hudson and Marishka Hargitay. Jimmy D went off propecia and his libido returned two fold. Jimmy D. took the filth mouth award from me. Jimmy is a fan of Hanson! Jimmy says he wouldn’t go on Arsenio as a standup as he is not a 5 minute comic. Jimmy D. tells a story about doing a set to possibly be a sidekick for conan back when the old light night show started. Everyone was bombing and the Jimmys both were excited to get up there to kill the room. Neither of them did.
65 – They talk about a comic who always killed who also bombed that night. Real tough crowd. Matt still wants us to guess who they saw. Jimmy did another show with this comic, MR, who then bombed his explanation: Sometimes you have to do your show slower and without laughs to really see where the jokes are. Eliot is here! Thumb is up! He’s drawing or something.
Jimmy D counting cameras! Jimmy D asks if Jimmy ever considered doing the show weekly in front of an audience. Jimmy said no but after that question yes. Jimmy likes the idea of live performances being special and the show is more about talking than “performing” to the audience.
70 – Jimmy Dore is here! Comedy and Everything Else hasn’t had an episode in like a year. Jimmy d is gonna be at the improve on 11/30. “more like always not funny.” – idiot itunes reviewer. Everyone loves the Batkid event! Apparently the kid is in remission which is good news. Check out #BatKid on twitter for some great pics, etc. Jimmy annoyed by the idiot comments turning negative about the event.
75 – Jimmy d doesn’t get shitting on people doing good because they aren’t doing the good you think they should be doing. Jimmy d thinks he was more wound up than other people as he moved through the business. Jimmy tells a story about his dad visiting years ago when he and Pat were still roomates. They both had auditions and had to come back and tell him they didn’t get it. He didn’t understand how they could do it over and over.
The Disney show Jimmy was referring to is called Crash & Bernstein. Jimmy d wonders if people think he is old now on stage. He says people don’t care as long as youre funny. Jimmy says there is a point where you are too young and too old. Louis Black was older when he started, he used to be a professor!
80 – Both Jimmys enjoy Louis Black. Jimmy D says he is a super nice guy who gave him some good advice at a critical point in his career. Jimmy d mentions Jimmy’s salt and pepper. Jimmy says he hasn’t painted it in a while. Jimmy D asked, very strongly, that Dan Kaufman dye his hair so that he didn’t have to feel old. He doesn’t wait grey/white haired people around him. Jimmy D got a new dog! Mini Pinture/Chihuahua mix. Jimmy D acknowledges that Jimmy is successfully living without a dog. Jimmy d tried to go back on anti depressants after he lost his dog and had every side effect possible. So he tried getting a new dog instead. He talks about the experience of going to the shelters and how difficult it is. Also that they were going to kill all the puppies that the dog they were looking at that was pregnant with. They got Brownie (the pincher/Chihuahua) dog after that nightmare. Jimmy d is super happy with the dog.
90 – Jimmy D asks if Matt makes the same mistakes with his kid as his parents made with him. Both Jimmy and Matt believe they were raised well. Most of Jimmy’s issues came from problems at school. Jimmy asks if Jimmy D hasn’t spoken in 6 days since he is talking a LOT. All great though!
Richie Incognito talk. I honestly don’t have the slightest idea what this is about. Jimmy d brings up the Alec Baldwin issue as well. Jimmy mentions how TMX edits everything out and only shows the blow ups that happen. Jimmy just saw the Buzz Aldrin video for the first time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wptn5RE2I-k
95 – Obamacare chat! Jimmy D explains how the democrats should handle the criticism while Jimmy yells out issues at him.
We’ll be right back!
We’re back! We’re here. Matt’s still sleepy. Jimmy destroyed by Halloween. He needs a fun size snickers every night or his body doesn’t know what to do. Jimmy d was eating a bag of raisenettes every night. He cut out sugar and lost weight, sleeps better, etc. 12 kids in jimmy d’s family! His dad was a cop and did masonry. They’d all get into an RV and go on a trip with the family when his dad had a furlough. They went everywhere. He always felt poor around the cousins they’d camp with. Jimmy d had pb&J sandwiches at a picnic while the cousins had ham sandwiches and soda.
100 – Celeb sighting Kato Kailin! The guys talk about people angrily saying they’ve met them before when they introduce themselves. People still think you’re a dick if you forget their names Jimmy d says.
105 – matt says he is living the life since people don’t care if he remembers them or not. Jimmy tells matt to be proud of his name. He’s Matt. Jimmy d talks about having the kind of person you try to get away from walk out on him. He was outraged. Jimmy d tells about someone getting upset over him swearing on a show.
110 – Jimmy d wants to play a game where we use different words for swear words. Jimmy d asks where the swear jar is. Jimmy describes it was a jar specifically for the F word. I do not think Alec Baldwin is a homophobe just a rage monster. Jimmy agrees.
Jimmy’s got no problem with stickers.
People telling Jimmy he got his mom out of Chicago just in time, “They’re comin’, Jim.” Famous people in carmel, ID http://carmel-indiana.funcityfinder.com/notable-people-carmel-indiana/.
Jimmy Ds brother is the VP of White Castle! His and his brother’s house are worth the same.
We’re done! Bonus time!
Jimmy D has a book coming out this spring. Preorder it. It’s called Your Country’s Not That Into You.
Matt wonders if Jimmy d is gonna have Greg Berhendt write something for the book.
Jimmy again suggests that Jimmy d moves to Burbank.
First you get the money. Then you get the Power. Then you get the women.
Actual quote: In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.
Jimmy suggests we just cut the show at the 35 minute before jimmy d gets here. Jimmy Ds new tech guy is EXPENSIVE.
125 – get the NNF ap! We’re done. Long time! No one knows why it’s been so long since Jimmy was on. Hug your dog and get over it. – Jimmy
Don’t forget pardacastathon! Next week!
See you next time!
My Pleasure,
– Garon/The Thief/Cuban Defector/Scout/The Beast