15O – Slamming Doors with April Richardson

April Richardson

April Richardson

Join the Players Club

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher

April’s website

00 – Hello! Players Club STARRING Jimmy Pardo. Jimmy’s about to sneeze but isn’t sure if its in his head or not.

Tickly nose ghost dog allergy reaction

Jimmy talks about a flight where someone was walking their dog down the aisle of the plane.

What makes Eliot so goddamn special!

One handed catch of the Kleenex by Jimmy.


True or False Hacksaw Hamilton tweeted Jimmy. He says false but it is in deed true.

05 – In the air tonight urban legend:


Jimmy talks flags and phil hendrie

10 – Jimmy talks about seeing a GH actor while waiting for a plane. They struck up a conversation. Jimmy thinks he came off as a psycho fan.

15 – Flag information

Lowering the flag or Retreat ceremony. 

Jimmy talks more about Spinelli from GH! 

Bradford Anderson plays him. A couple hours later, he tweeted Jimmy.

20 – Matt theorizes that all the kidnapped babies on GH are by the same person. Jimmy said that’s happened before.

Sonny’s arrested for Murder! Lot of criminal stuff happening on GH right now apparently.

The guys talk Nashville. Jimmy wants it to be 2 hours long.

April Richardson is here! She’s looking spiffy! All matched up!

She’s not fucking around!

She’s got his money!

Jimmy got everyone’s Culture Club tickets and wants his money. For humor.

Continue reading

1515 – Rocking On with Pat Francis

Famed women's tennis champion Pat Francis

Famed women’s tennis champion Pat Francis

Listen to this episode for free

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher


00 – Hello! Indeed welcome! 1510 is not this episode but it is a good one. They’re all Jimmy’s babies.

Stomach issues! Ohhhhh LAWDY!!!!

Stomach issues! Ohhhhh LAWDY!!!!

Jimmy’s having tummy issues. The elections are gonna set the black man back. Jimy not sure why his Louisiana plantation owner is upset about the black man.

Jimmy was in Louisville this weekend. Jimmy talks about the voice of the dumb. Jimmy talks about the guy who came up to him at the show. Said he lumbered over to him and was the size of the yeti with mutton-chops.

Jimmy acknowledges Matt’s gotta get to rick-rolling people. He prefers Matt’s hair up to down.

A guy who interviewed Jimmy last week from Paste, had a great head of hair.

Jimmy hates the brothers from another mother phrase but he thinks that Michael might be just that.

Michael Dunaway – @michaeldunaway

05 – A gaggle of dumb came to the shows down at the Laughing Derby. Talking, not heckling, just not shutting up.

Jimmy doesn’t understand the mentality of going to a show and assuming that they have to be good to you. Comedy is probably more subjective than most art forms so hope for funny don’t expect it. If you’re dropping money on tickets/food/etc, make sure you do a little research to make sure you are gonna enjoy the comic.

Go in positive!

10 – The venue is going through a change. Simple comedy outweighs the smart comedy, like Peoria was. Louisville is changing to the opposite like Peoria is now.

Cultivate an audience!

Don’t give away tickets.

Better clients, better comics, better reputation is you do it Jimmy’s suggested way.

Don’t move Eliot, let’s stay stationary.

Cash that fucking check Eliot!
Eliot may not know what a bit is. He took us into a cool-du-sac.

Matt and Jimmy wish they’d lived in a cul-de-sac.

15 – Eliot’s hair was getting shaggy so he cut it. Jimmy not a fan of it. I complimented him on it.

Jimmy’s got a ipad mail taking up memory but not deleting when he deletes it.

More GB chat while I’m out with our guest.

20 – Jimmy goes on about putting a hooker in the ocean related to the bowling ball and feather experiment going around facebook.

Eliot says he did that in junior high.

Jimmy balks.

Let NASA have something, Eliot.

The guys talk about the space plane crashing.

Put something up your ass and tickle around a bit.

Guys talk about fitting a bowling ball up the ass.

Jimmy describes the procedure to get that ball up there.

Eliot might go see Wicked despite hearing how awful it is.

Continue reading

15N – Jumping Cars with Gary Brightwell.

Welcome to wonderful newcomer Gary_Brightwell

Welcome to wonderful newcomer Gary_Brightwell

Join the Players Club!

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher

Gary’s website

My guess 15 Nightmare

00 – Welcome to Never Not Funny! Episode 15 N…..last week Matt posted season 14. Jimmy says he has coined the term sheeple. Jimmy hates people who call people sheeple.

The country is in good shape guys.

Jimmy got a Brass Transit cd via mail. They’re a great Chicago cover band.

Brass Transit 

05 – Matt and Zoe are rollerblading together.

Things are a little shaky after getting the Eliot treatment last week.

Wildflower by Skylark

Wildflower by Skylark

Happy belated birthday Matt! Sorry the pizza sucked.

10 – 9 out of 10 people who own a Jag or higher probably can’t drive.

Do not call pizza pie around Jimmy.


Jimmy finally watched 20 Feet From Stardom. He loved it.

Merry Clayton is the back up singer Jimmy is trying to think of 

Merry Clayton was injured in a car crash

Darlene Love 

Aretha was indeed on Atlantic 

15 – Jimmy and Matt tak more 20 Feet From Stardom.

Lisa Fischer 

20 – If Van Morrison walked in Jimmy’d break his nose. Matt thinks that is almost insane.

Shout out to NeverNotQuotes! 

Gary Brightwell is our guest today and he is not on Twitter. He’s trying to join but someone has his name.

Update: he’s @Gary_Brightwell

Continue reading

15M – Stirring it Up with Greg Warren

Greg Warren

Greg Warren

Join the Players Club to watch / listen to this episode.

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher

Greg’s Website

00 – The door is open as it is each and every episode.

15 M as in it will be revealed later.

Jimmy names as may American Idol winners as he can

Ruben and Truman’s win was shocking.

Jimmy got an allergy shot today. He’s a little fuzzy headed today. Matt thinks its an excuse for delaying his America Idol list.


05 – Jimmy details his route getting here from the doctors. Sounds like it was a nightmare. He was also stuck behind a mailman.

10 – Beverly Hills Cop Soundtrack chat and snippets.
Movie 1984
Soundtrack 1985 MCA

15 – Our guest is here! Greg Warren. He is sitting politely while we still talk Beverly hills cop.

20 – Jimmy and Matt talk about the gopro video of the woman walking and getting cat calls. http://www.cnn.com/2014/10/28/living/hollaback-10-hours-walking-in-nyc/index.html

The guys talk how they’d react to a woman with large bosom.

25 – Greg knows how to handle himself in a radio format he has to know he doesn’t have a mic. Danielle is a big fan of Greg Warren!

Matt drops a 9/11 joke that doesn’t land very well. There’s not a bigger fan of 9/11 jokes than Jimmy and he takes offense to Matt’s joke. Ya understand!?

Suck a dick if you don’t like the jokes!

Jimmy is seeing Kiss tonight courtesy of his LAKiss season tickets.

Continue reading

1514 – Passing Notes with Matt Besser

Matt Besser, not thinking.

Matt Besser, not thinking.

Listen to this episode for free!

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher


00 – Hello and welcome! 1514! Take a little trip! Jimmy’s chair is a little off. Jimmy goes outside to find out what the noise is.


Mason Reese 

Solid 9/11.

05 – I’m alone in my not enjoyment of Chris Rock’s SNL monologue.

Jimmy liked a lot of it. Word Choice!

5 people died in the Boston marathon bombings 

It’s comedy don’t be offended by jokes is Jimmy’s take on Chris Rock’s monologue.

The  slogan Matt was trying to remember is “54-40 or fight” but it’s about the Oregon territory dispute

Jimmy wonders if Chris Rock has a bit of palsy.

Matt and Jimmy wonder if Chris was a little rusty.

10 – Jimmy and Matt talk more about the SNL monologue.

Jimmy talks about having to follow Chris Rock on stage and being bumped by him.

15 – Tight set from Dat Phan or 45 minutes of Chris Rock working out his set?

Jimmy is on board with Foot Cardigans.

Chew some gum hillbillies smoking in airport bathroom stall.

A woman next to Jimmy busted out some hard boiled eggs on the plane.

20 – We don’t need these mother fucking eggs on these mother fucking plane


Eggs kickstarter 

Soleil Moon Frye did have a breast reduction 

25 – FootCardigan.com code word frosty2!

“You don’t need socks!” – Danielle to Jimmy at Target. Jimmy’s got too many socks.

Matt Besser knows how a sock handles itself.

Head-sweaters was mentioned in episode 1411 with Matt Walsh. Never Not Notes, remembers, even if no one else does, Jimmy! 

Johnny Intern the sloth.

Continue reading

1513 – Chasing Beauty with Ellis Paul

Ellis Paul

Ellis Paul

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher


00 – Hot! Hot! Hot in the headphones! Welcome to the show! 1513! Took a little trip on the mighty mississip. Eliot just froze up like he’s never froze up before. Joseph Limbaugh’s got Eliot rattled!

Jimmy talks about his the dallas airport attack.

Apparently Paul Rudd was part of this?!!

05 – More airport talk.


Matt and Jimmy and Danielle went to the muck run. Matt flew through it because he had to use the bathroom.

10 – Seems like the muck run was more family friendly than warrior dash. Great fun. Danielle and Jimmy stayed together the entire time. “Wheels” took off.

Great fun at the muck run! Jimmy would do it every weekend if he could. Or maybe one a month.

15 – Lori Petty was in Tank Girl. Has had some substance issues in the past.

Eliot asks about shirt selection for the muck run. Jimmy was wearing a Triumph t-shirt. He says he tries to wear something he doesn’t think he’ll wear again. Matt wore his NNF season 13 shirt.

Matt’s wife does the laundry. Jimmy razzes him on it. Matt says that he does the cooking and Jimmy says that’s interesting because she should be doing that too.

Danielle does some cleaning but luckily she lives with Felix Unger so it’s kept pretty neat anyway.

Lots of heavy mud on this race.

20 – Pumpkin Patch trip with Oliver! Jimmy got ready for the 5k on Sunday at 5:30. He did it! The day after the muck run he did the 5k! He feels fine except for the knee issue that keeps popping up after half marathons. It’s the outside of the right knee.

After about 9 miles the knee flared up. Right around the spot that the course starts going up hill towards a bridge. 2 hours 20 minutes on this 5k.

Matt is on board with Eliot’s “in the shower?” question.

“Whatever it is, I’m against it.” – Groucho Marx.

Ya understand?!

All for humor guys! Jimmy’s calling Eliot an idiot is all for humor.

Knee pain

Knee pain

Jimmy’s knee still hurts.

Continue reading

15L – Wheeling and Dealing with Oscar Nunez

Oscar Nunez, happy to be back on Never Not Funny

Oscar Nunez, happy to be back on Never Not Funny

Join the Players Club! It’s the right thing to do.

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher


My guess L as in Loverboy

00 – Welcome to Epitode 15L!

Joe Pepitone 


Mad Dog is here! He and Matt talk about Seinfeld. Mad Dog True or False’s Matt!


So long Mad Dog!

05 – He’s back! Shut the fuck up Mad Dog is Matt’s suggestion so they can learn the Pepitone Jersey #.

Mad Dog’s father apparently enjoyed the beer and beat him.

Gary Gulman had a great phone app joke on Conan.

Jimmy was close to the right number with his 22 guess.

Mad Dog is taking off again.

Jimmy enjoys when people ask Mad Dog questions.

10 – Jimmy calls bullshit on Mad Dog’s father issues. Tells him to “Frozen it (let it go)”

Jimmy confirms Matt is in his MCI five.

ING changes name to Voya. 

Matt talks about Quick Books.

Eliot’s got a friend is in. Joseph Limbaugh. He’s worked with Jimmy a few times over the year including a short film and some sketches for Acme Saturday Night.

brady15 – Jimmy talks more about the acme show and it having a light house because it was up against a Max Fun show.

Eliot is training Joseph just in case he gets sick. Jimmy wants to make sure Eliot isn’t training him for other darker reasons.
The guys talk about the first time Eliot was in here with Andrew.

20 – Jimmy would like Eliot to not say True Dat for his own safety.

Jimmy says Eliot is the only guy who can shut down a rally. When he gets on his soap box flags come down banners are rolled up.

Joesph thinks there is just the right amount of cameras.

Eliot dropped a lens cover and Jimmy said it sounded like a Polynesian band was coming in.

Jimmy’s dad was in a Polynesian band as a drummer.

The Brady Bunch Hawaii storyline was 3 episodes!

Continue reading

1512 – Sitting Pretty with Gary Gulman


Gary Gulman cleverly obscuring an address that is not the Never Not Funny studio anyway

Listen to this episode for free!

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher


00 – Hello and welcome! Jimmy is the host of the show who is not sure which episode number we’re on. 1516? Nope. Christine 16 is a Kiss song.

05 – Jimmy took over the computer to go over Christine 16 (Love Gun) lyrics and 17 by Winger.

Jimmy finally guessed the episode number.

Jimmy opened for Laurie Kilmartin at her shows this weekend. At the one of the shows someone was trying to videotape on his phone. He got all entitled when Jimmy told him to shut it off.

10 – Jimmy tells the story about the guy videoing who then was playing with his phone trying to take down what he had already uploaded.

It was a great night and Laurie killed!

15 – Apparently someone uploaded footage of Jen Kirkman that she was asking to take down via twitter. Hannibal Burress had the same thing happen.

Our guest is here! He looks great! He’s a tall man. 6’6! His shorts would be pants on Jimmy. Our guest is staying with a former college classmate who lives nearby so he walked over.

We don’t talk about Atlanta or Crime on the show Gary. So no go on your story.

Gary played football at Boston College. 6 and 5 record in his senior year.

20 – Heathcliff 

Calvin Peete

25 – Troy Donahue 

Does not appear to have released any music.

Gary Gulman headlining Largo as this episode releases.

“Oh Machine.” – movie quote

Continue reading

15K – Popping In with Dave Holmes

Dave was in such a hurry to leave, he didn't have time for Matt's usual 2-hour portrait session. Here's a drawing!

Dave was in such a hurry to leave, he didn’t have time for Matt’s usual 2-hour portrait session. Here’s a drawing!

Join the Players Club!

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and Additional Notes by Darryl Asher


00 – Welcome to the players club! Jimmy’s wearing the shirt as you do in a club environment.

Jimmy thinks Matt is wasting away. Matt says he has a gut so he’s not wasting away.

Jimmy and Matt have a Much Run coming up, the day after which Jimmy has a 5k.

Jimmy get me the Steven Spielberg set! What a joy!

Matt: Darryl Asher creating a Cooze in the Carpool Lane icon right now

Still talkin’ ’bout that Skype appearance!

Darryl Asher is still talking about that Skype. Next time, pull a rabbit out of a hat instead of beating off in a hotel room. (Darryl says: “Next time? You mean I get to do it again?”)

Whooaaaa! Jimmy’s checking something out on Twitter.

05 – Jimmy talks about Shark Tank! Calls it the new Kojak. Matt mentions Joe Wagner again.

Oliver and Jimmy watched Shark Tank together and try to guess if they’re gonna get the money or not.

Shark Tank guys:
Robert Herjavec 
Kevin Harrington 
Kevin O’Leary
Daymond John 
Mark Cuban
Lori Greiner
Barbara Corcoran

Mike Olson via twitter thanks Eliot for birthday wishes, stirs up a little controversy on the Eliot Challenge!

10 – Jimmy forgot to give our guest the address.

Matt wanted to talk about 4th and Loud and apparently the finale did not record!

Jimmy talks about the finale episode of 4th and loud. Jimmy was at the game featured on the episode calls it one of the best games he’s been too. Calls it a great episode of television.

15 – It might make him upgrade his seats even more because he is so invested now. He’s already excited for the new season.
He has 40 minutes left on the podcast episode he was talking about and wonders if they talk about the team name LA Kiss.

20 – Matt gives Kiss credit for their Merch knowledge.

Brett Bouchy 

When a Man Loves a Woman 1994

Jimmy and Matt are using words like championships, expansion teams, I don’t know what they mean.

Continue reading

1511 – Making Pictures with Doug Benson

Doug Benson, watching a movie out of the corner of his eye

Doug Benson, watching a movie out of the corner of his eye

Listen to this episode for free!

In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher


00 – Welcome to 1511! Jimmy thought it was 1517. Jimmy was made to feel bad.

Jimmy just got back from Peoria! Lots of great fans came out including Jim Glass and family!

Jimmy and Matt talk Guns and Roses.

Jimmy bought some CDs/Albums from Co-Op Records!

Matt calls out Jimmy for not remembering the last names of the guys that opened for him.

Jimmy thought Aretha Franklin’s version of Rolling In The Deep was just fine. Unnecessary but fine.

Enough of Tony Bennett!

05 – Jimmy talks about white fan Lyle’s shirt with the wrong name of his town on it still a great shirt though!

Lots of great fans came out to multiple shows! Good times! Great comics out of Chicago came down to open for him too.

Halloween costume shopping last year. This year he is going as Oliver Wood from Harry Potter. 

Jimmy is not going to dress up this year.

10 – Spider chat! Eliot has a spider in his equipment.

6k spiders in a house. For real: another link.

Jimmy talks about the huge spider he saw.

deathstareP90X chat and diet/work out fat chat. Apparently p90x people get a little crazy.

“Go do another crunch fuck fuck.” – Jimmy

15 – Good Charlotte chat.

20 – Jimmy talks about parking at the airport and having it washed. The guy moved the seat back and up. No memory button in the Prius so he’s still trying to get it right.

Fan Lyle has a beautiful wife!

Eliot gets the longest death stare from Jimmy. Interrupted by Jimmys phone.

Eliot says “True ‘Dat.”

Eliot is also wearing a Chuck shirt.

Matt doesn’t watch Walking Dead or Big Bang Theory.

Continue reading