NeverNotNotes

1218 – Tee-shirt Giveaway with Howard Kremer

In-studio notes by Garon Cockrell

For Never Not Funny 1218 Jimmy Pardo welcomes Howard Kremer

@howardkremer

http://www.haveasummah.com

Howard Kremer has a tee shirt for you

Howard Kremer has a tee shirt for you

00 – Inndeeeed! Welcome to 1-2-1-8. Rainy day in Georgia! Chicago spring like day. Great weather for a run this morning. Jimmy won his gortex, not unlike the gorton fisherman. He wore a rain bonnet. Jimmy recounts a blind date with someone who responds Thank You to everything. Jimmy and Danielle’s 15 year anniversary (married 9) on May 11! Jimmy’s run went from gloom to sun to gloom and as he got to his house the downpour started. Down Boys is Warrant. Jimmy riding the high symbol! Jimmy doesn’t listen to the show. He doesn’t care for…3/4ths of it.

Play against Jimmy on You Don’t Know Jack! IOS and Android. YDKJ.COM

05 – Jimmy back on a Phil Hendrie kick. Subscribed to his podcast. 80 a year (breaks down to the number of the beast a month). Jimmy wrote down YDNJ for No. You can also go to http://youdontknowjack.com/. Jimmy has a T-Shirt from You Don’t Know Jack T-shirt that he’ll give away. Contest coming up!

10 – Matt suggests practice round before playign Jimmy. Jimmy kaboshes and says to do it cold turkey like he did. Jimmy asking if Eliot is on meds as he seems overly happy. Eliot finished his documentary related to the occupy movement. A ten minute mini-doc. Jimmy stung by a bee for the first time in his life on Saturday.

15 – Jimmy’s top (six) Dave Matthews songs: Crash Into Me, #41, So Much To Say, Too Much, Satellite, You & Me.

Jimmy lists off his top Neil Young songs…I missed most of them! Too fast! Godfather of grunge?

20 – Back to the bee. Jimmy coaching Oliver’s team (first base). Jimmy thinks he is a great asst. coach but not a great head coach, not enough fundementals. He got a pain in his forehead and found out a bee was stinging him. Danielle asked if he was crying. the benedryl he took pretty much killed his saturday. Bee Movie is awful despite Seinfeld being a great comedian. Bee Movie is the one part of seinfeld that isnt great.

Here comes the Matt Walsh winner after the break!

25 – Oliver has NO INTEREST in the Fraggle Rock DVDs. Jimmy cleaning my ipad. I’m doing great! Eliot’s great!

BRB!

30 – We’re back! Contest giveaway coming up! Jimmy as a great book on tape about gambling. 2:30 – 3:00 maximum. Teaches you to know when to hold em and to fold em. Price of face Lifts range from $6,000 to $25,000. Jimmy compares a bee sting to suicide by cop. Jimmy got a new paint job on the hair. Jimmy thinks Kenny Rogers drpped 25k. Howard says he dined with Kenny Rogers at a Beni Hana…he sat 5 tables away.

Lucille went #1 in 1977.

Nashville talk. Howard things the dudes are useless, except Chip/Deacon. Everyone loves Connie Britton as well as Hayden Panietteire. Apparently Wyclef was also on the show (I’m 5 episodes behind).

35 – Howard does not do Smash. Who Charted is the name of Howard’s Podcast he hosts with Kulap!

Howard Kremer (pronounced Kramer) is here!

40 – Jeff Hanneman from Slayer passed…allegedly from a spiderbite?

Dolly Parton’s Jolene is from 1973. Jimmy tells a Jerry Reed scooby doo story about them getting tickets to his sold out show. They show the angle from Jerry’s view and it’s full of empty seats.

45 – Jim Stafford song Spiders and snakes charted in 1974. Jimmy enjoys the Little Willies cover of Jolene with Norah Jones. Howard saw an early show by the White Stripes where Jack did a cover of Jolene and his mind was blown. Matt says to check out Miley Cyrus’ version of Jolene. Jimmy feels bad for her dad Billy Ray Cyrus. He’s a talent! Howard endorses Party in the USA as a good song. Obama: I got 99 problems and Jay-Z is one.

50 – The #1 song when Spiders and Snakes was #3 was Seasons In The Sun by Terry Jacks The Way We Were by Barbra Streisand was #2. Matt has never been to a drive-in! Jimmy used to go every week when he worked at a Jeans store.

55 – They played softball and then went to a drive-in movie every sunday. Also they tried to fuck the same girl who was part of their entourage. Jimmy calls his record store time the funnest of his life pre-Danielle and Oliver. Howard calls it Jimmy’s Big Chill. “You Can’t Go Home Again” is indeed Thomas Wolfe.

60 – Contest time! gambling time! howard 17 took Jimmy’s # offers to sell it to him), eliot 11, garon 69, Matt goes 32 Jimmy goes 71.

The # is….27! No winner! The PRIZE winner is Johnny Peterson!

65 – You can get Howard’s new album Douche Minutae online and at http://howardkremer.bandcamp.com/

Howard’s dad retired to Milwaulkee Wisconson, rather than a tropical location like we all guessed. Baseball Steroid chats! Jimmy calls Roger Clemens a prick.

70 – Jimmy wishes luck to everyone who can hold and throw a football. Howard calls it counter intuitive.

All star games: Chicago, Illinois – Comiskey Park (1933, 1950, 1983), Wrigley Field (1947, 1962, 1990), U.S. Cellular Field (2003)

75 – Both Jimmy and Howard attended Academy of Dramatic arts (different places). People tell Jimmy he looks like Uncle Floyd Vivino. Jimmy thinks golfers get a bad rap as a bunch of rich white guys. In fact they don’t make much money at all and often sleep on couches.

80 – Journeyman golfers are not unlike comedians in how they live and work. The Deer Urine Spray jimmy mentioned is actually Deer Antler Spray: Made from male deer antlers during the stage when the antlers are covered in soft fuzz, the unproven performance enhancer is often used by athletes who believe it helps heal cartilage and tendon injuries more quickly and boosts strength and endurance.

Howard celebrated cinco de mayo at a french restaraunt and bastille day at taco bell.

We’ll be back!

85 – We’re back with Howard Kremer host of Who Charted with Kulap! Full of Comedy and Numbers. Johhny Peterson Wins again and now is the origin of the Peterson Principle: You can only win twice! Do not go to incestry.com! Jimmy is trying to say Ancestry.com! Howard thinks it’s a good idea for a site. Jimmy was on Kyle and Ray this week! Jimmy mentioned the Cliff Floyd quote of the week.

Cliff Floyd Quote of the Week: You want a good outfield, you gotta go with the big dogs!

90 – Public Correction: Jimmy say he won American 5 and National 3. He got some shit on it. Flip those: he won American 3 times and National 5 times. Jimmy has been playing fantasy baseball since 1992. A trailblazer! Bill Gorgo handled the numbers. Howard does fantasy football with the family. Howard says his brother Lee is abbrasive but not sad. His wife has 11 ferrets!

95 – 7th caller gets a Howard Kremer T-shirt! Colorado and Wyoming checking in. Tom and Seth. Caller #3. Jason from NYC. Caller 4 – Matt from Columbus OH. Caller 5: Mikey. caller 6: Kelly our first lady calling in from seattle. Caller 7 is Ben from Chicago Illinois, Humble park. He wins the Howard Kremer t-shirt! Ben loves all kinds. Ben’s trying to get into Comedy doing open mics around town. Ben enjoys Pete Holmes, thanks to hearing him on NNF! His new shirt is a 90/10 blend. Great call.

100 – Jimmy loves getting the calls. We’re a morning zoo now. Google transcribing voicemails from the folks we couldn’t get to. Howard talks about a guest, Eric Andre, eating a sandwich on the show that angered their listeners.

115 – Eric Andre was hysterical at a conan writers event. BTW Scott Smith is the bassist from Loverboy.

Jimmy wishes he could tell more family stories but they didn’t sign up for it so he doesn’t.

What a joy!

My Pleasure,
– Garon/The Thief/Cuban Defector/Scout/The Beast