625 – Chris Fairbanks
Pardcast.com message board for this episode
[NOTE: Look up your own songs on YouTube! I have other stuff to do! But I might link them later.]
Intro: Penultimate episode! Winding down the season like a new age DJ.
1:20 Matt understands that he should not interrupt Jimmy’s new age DJ vibe
1:30 “How am I doin’? Look out the goddam window!”
2:00 Low tones = sore throat
2:15 [TURN YOUR IPOD DOWN!!!!]
2:30 You know how to sign up for season 7, so screw it
2:40 Look in the pardcast.com message board for the music bed to do your season 7 intro
2:55 Darryl Shoutout “Darryl is doing a terrific job” at NeverNotNotes.com
3:00 Chris thinks I’m from Missoula, Montana (because of an earlier conversation we had about my daughter being in Missoula. I live in Billings)
3:05 Never have Jimmy and Matt sounded so sure but been so wrong
3:10 Chris’s hat tells Jimmy he wants to get back to the ocean
3:25 Remember to visit Eliot’s website HDIND DOT FACE
4:05 “Hello Eliot”
4:15 Panicky Dan might want to talk
5:15 Dan Cronin thinks Never Not Funny should be called Banter Bootcamp
5:25 Jimmy has no idea what a patent is
5:50 Matt has thoughts about humidity
6:15 Chris needs extra time to travel by boat. Or skateboard.
6:45 Hot, open-faced sandwich
7:00 Chris has a tasty riddle
7:05 “Darryl don’t put a picture of Chris’s ridiculous hat”
7:30 The world’s quickest back-pedal
7:45 Daryl Dragon Shoutout
8:00 The Captain and Tenille
9:00 Dio and Dragon
9:30 Chris wears his confidence on his head
9:45 Clowns are for who, exactly?
10:00 Clown of the Future!
10:30 Matt knows absolutely everything about Insane Clown Posse, including their names
11:40 Which is more ghetto? 8 Mile or 7 Mile? [Darryl says: I was born and raised in Detroit. Matt is right: The lower the number, the further into the city. But, 8 Mile is the border to the suburbs. If you really want street cred, you have to be where there are no mile roads. Like where I lived.]
13:00 A shoutout to Chris’s coxswain
13:30 Kirstie Alley gargles gravel
14:00 Toni Tenille’s Torch Songs
14:20 Jimmy is now totally reliant on Intern Dan for all of his knowledge
14:45 “Now I know what that guy’s talking about!”
14:50 Daryl Dragon and Toni Tenille’s biographical info
15:30 Marty and Elayne at The Dresden
17:15 “Marty gets it. Elayne kinda gets it.”
18:15 “A giant heap of rowdy powder.”
18:30 Chris was a human pinata
19:10 Sing along with Jimmy: Love Will Keep Us Together (The Captain and Tenille)
19:15 I’m not sure Jimmy’s lyrics are 100% accurate
20:00 Sing along with Jimmy: Do That To Me One More Time (The Captain and Tenille)
20:25 Sing along with Jimmy: Shop Around (The Captain and Tenille)
20:45 Noel Paul Stookey’s Wedding Song: There Is Love
21:45 Jimmy proves the need for remedial female anatomy
22:30 The guys know a lot about feminine hygiene products
23:05 REO Speedwagon
23:20 “I think you’re interesting”
23:40 Jimmy wishes he could experience himself from the perspective of others
24:20 Sing along with Jimmy: Red Rain (Peter Gabriel)
24:45 Sing along with Jimmy: The Things We Do for Love (10cc)
24:50 Do critics like Garbage?
25:25 What does Matt think of Jimmy’s singing movie critic idea?
25:45 Wayne Brady is a terrific entertainer, and NOT a jerk-face
27:00 The filming location of Let’s Make a Deal
28:00 Jimmy dishes some little-known information about Las Vegas
28:30 Never Not Funny sold out the theater at Bridgetown. Except the balcony.
29:00 Bridgetown is great! But should they skip a year?
30:20 Darryl Shoutout “You’re from the same city as this Darryl guy?” [Darryl says: Again, Chris is wrong.]
31:30 Chris only watches pilots
32:10 The Fairbanks! CD and the dramatic breakdown in the AST Records / Fairbanks negotiations
33:45 Chris doesn’t do well in sleeveless Austin, Texas
35:15 Chris’s tee shirts were the opposite of an impulse buy
36:00 Season One Matt shows up unannounced
36:55 Sing along with Jimmy: I Will Always Love You (Whitney Houston)
37:15 The secret to record sales: charity and death
37:30 Obsession about record sales figures
38:45 Jimmy’s career as a record executive
39:45 “Those people are very loyal, the hillbilly”
40:10 End of the Road vs. Achy Breaky Heart
41:30 Half-heartedly Sing along with Jimmy: Everyone Knows It’s Windy / Never My Love (The Association)
41:53 Sing along with Jimmy: Achy Breaky Heart (Billy Ray Cyrus)
42:15 “Billings, Montana is a horrible city” [Darryl says: That’s where I live. He’s not too wrong.]
42:45 Line dancing and ass-grabbing in gym class
44:00 Jimmy, Matt, and Pat know how to have a good time in a hotel room
45:00 How did Chris develop his own aggressive street style of dance?
45:45 Men at Work and Men Without Hats
46:40 Sing along with Jimmy: Pop Goes the World (Men Without Hats)
47:20 Jimmy dusts off an oldie
47:50 Jimmy gestures like an 8 year old
48:30 Sing along with Jimmy: Safety Dance (Men Without Hats)
49:00 Pop singers as cartoon animals
50:00 Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown
50:45 The return of the My Prerogative joke
51:45 Red-headed fire down below
52:30 Barenaked Ladies
53:00 Matt calls Jimmy “Jim”
53:45 Sing along with Jimmy: One Week (Barenaked Ladies)
54:15 Penis sound effects
55:20 Sing along with Jimmy: Come Sail Away (Styx)
55:30 Sing along with Jimmy: Sailing (Christopher Cross)
56:00 Songs that start with engine sounds
56:45 Soundtrack albums: La Bamba vs. Stand By Me
57:00 Plug time: Fairbanks!
57:35 BREAK TIME
58:20 Pizza was ordered on the break
59:00 Chris is busy growing out his hair
59:15 Felangie talk
59:30 Favorite words
1:00:46 Sing along with Jimmy: The Trolley Song
1:01:00 Oliverism of the day: “What’s this game?”
1:02:00 Jimmy might be better friends with Chris than he thinks
1:03:00 Beer in the kiddie pool
1:04:20 Horsie sound effects
1:04:50 Sing along with Jimmy: Rock the Boat
1:05:00 Is there too much swearing on Never Not Funny?
1:05:45 The consequences of energy drinks
1:07:00 More Stand By Me talk
1:07:30 There are pizza-ordering issues
1:08:00 Dan is proud of failure
1:09:00 Suffleboard / shuttlecock / nautical theme / exhaustion
1:10:45 In what way is Eliot wrong?
1:10:55 Sing along with Jimmy: Play that Funky Music (Wild Cherry)
1:11:45 Jimmy’s retro shirt is not retro
1:12:00 Never Not Funny Season Six shirt
1:13:15 Chris has a tattoo that looks like this: <3
1:14:00 Chris almost gets beaten by a Brazilian Jujitsu enthusiast
1:17:30 The “less than three” symbol has special meaning
1:19:00 Matt’s taste in music pisses Jimmy off
1:19:35 Sing along with Jimmy: Headin’ for a Heartbreak (Def Leppard?)
1:20:50 Sing along with Jimmy: Electric Eye
1:21:00 How did the Judas Priest guy stay closeted?
1:21:40 Bret Michaels’ brain surgery
1:22:00 TJ Miller is recovering from brain surgery
1:22:50 Sing along with Jimmy : Unskinny Bop
1:23:20 Matt’s cell phone cover is as popular as ever
1:24:30 Stupid Question of the Week
1:24:45 Joshua Hamer asks: More annoying: country music or jazz?
1:27:15 Ahhh MY BACK IS TIGHT!!!!
1:27:20 Stupid Question of the Week. David Hudson asks: Is it ok to listen to NNF with one earbud while grocery shopping?
1:28:00 Josh Gregovich asks: What would be your theme song?
1:28:30 Here begins the Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap controversy
1:31:30 Matt is the audio equivalent of the Devil Doll from Trilogy of Terror
1:32:10 Sing along with Jimmy: Everybody Dance Now
1:32:45 Season 7 subscription info. Keep it simple, stupid.
AK-47 gone, not forgotten
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