723 – Pat Francis

Released 10/20/10

Pardcast.com message board for this episode

Intro: A lot of new listeners from the Jon Hamm episode, so Jimmy reminds us he is the host. Reminder: Jimmy Pardo is the host of Never Not Funny.

1:30 Eliot is back with King Kong, and a microphone near him for confusing and bizarre reasons

2:00 Matt needs to be careful about what he jokes about

3:00 Whatever Eliot is doing is not sanctioned

3:30 Pat clunks things up before being introduced

4:20 Jimmy is serious about this control room idea

4:45 Let’s join in Jimmy’s fun!

5:20 Jimmy has an addictive style

5:40 Listen up people, Jimmy makes it look easy, but it’s not!

6:10 “Talk to the snowball!”

6:30 Guess the year of Dan’s KISS tee shirt

7:15 There’s something fishy about that shirt

8:00 Re-enacting WWII as a Nazi

9:30 Pat likes the distressed look of Dan’s shirt

9:50 Jimmy is wearing a busy Rolling Stones tee shirt

10:40 Pat is wearing Freddy Krueger’s sweater

11:00 The incredible difficulties of dressing appropriately for the weather

11:40 Pat’s passive-aggressive daughter

12:00 Pat has the inside scoop on a new website that has weather information

13:00 Jimmy is on day 47 of sty eye

13:05 Matt has information about Jimmy’s sty, even though Jimmy doesn’t want to hear it

13:40 Jimmy’s foot surgery recover was un-effing-bearable

14:00 Oooonnnnn the podcast!

14:15 Starting Episode 723-b

14:50 Eliot gives Jimmy AIDS

15:15 Walking around the room again

15:30 Dan’s drug history

16:00 Crack: the value drug

16:45 Jimmy likes the split screen Eliot is doing with the video

17:00 Star Wars doesn’t hold up as an adult

18:00 The Perfect Storm, a movie about a wave

19:40 Al Gore’s march to failure

20:00 Jimmy’s Ross Perot imitation and other old bits

21:20 Jimmy still does his luge bit

21:40 Jimmy Carter’s post presidency life

23:30 At Matt’s request: Jimmy in concert in Minneapolis

24:30 Room-papering: what it was, and how it worked

25:50 Would you go to a cheese-stick club?

26:20 Pat is a grower, not a shower

26:45 The biggest penis Jimmy ever saw

27:45 Yes or no to a bigger penis?

29:45 Dan’s crazy thermos tipping

30:20 Oooonnnnn the podcast!

30:25 Staring Episode 723-c

30:50 More details about the big crank than you need

31:50 Jimmy will revoke your subscription if you ask Eliot for his audio

33:00 How much dough to show?

33:30 Pat might have an idea that will bring him out of retirement

34:00 Is that a button in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?

34:05 Oooonnnnn the podcast!

34:15 Starting episode 723-d

35:00 Mark Zuckerberg: sympathetic character?

36:00 Don’t miss one line of Never Let Me Go

36:50 “This one time… at the Arclight…”

39:00 Last song people!

39:20 Kevin Cronin’s informercial

40:30 Don’t Forget the Lyrics, a 30 minute 5 minute game show

41:15 Pat’s new game show idea might just cost him his life

42:00 Matt’s celebrity sighting

44:00 The parking at Trashy Lingerie

45:35 “Yeah, so that’s when they hit me with the intervention!”

46:30 Jimmy’s fake-mad is as close to real-mad as he has ever come

47:00 Is Matt afraid that things will fall on him, Steve-O style?

47:20 Dan’s interpretive bottle dance

48:30 The saving grace of the iPod: no need for DJs!

49:15 The Dan Band is not needed at weddings or in movies

50:15 Darius Rucker’s new record is good stuff

51:00 JonBenet and Sarah Palin: a winning combo in Minneapolis

54:50 Pat stops the break for an important request of all listeners

56:10 BREAK TIME!

56:55 Starting episode 723-e

57:00 Pat has theories about skirts, pants, keys, and pockets

57:30 Pat was going to hang the bathroom keys from film reels

58:00 Jimmy has a good excuse for not seeing Pat Benatar with Pat

59:15 Are shoestring potatoes a hillbilly food? Specifically the Planter’s brand. In a canister. A canister; the planter’s brand.

1:01:00 The genius of Mr. Peanut

1:01:50 Pat doesn’t have a ticket, nor does he need one, to see Pat Benatar

1:03:30 Jimmy doesn’t remember talking about patches with Pat on the show

1:04:50 The most awkward 15 minutes of Matt’s life. And it involves Jon Hamm.

1:05:30 Pat will NOT lie about his bed time

1:06:00 The Event: uneventful

1:07:20 “I hope I have egg on my face, because I think that feels nice.”

1:08:00 Back to Pat’s Benatar-stalking

1:09:30 The finer points of Benatar’s videos

1:11:00 Prince-talk!

1:12:00 Pat’s Dan Band medley

1:13:15 Pat’s new show: The Schizophrenic Detective

1:15:15 Get ready for disappointment!!!

1:18:05 Matt’s nice piece of nursery rhyme business

1:19:30 Pat gets a coincidental craving for Jack-in-the-Box

1:23:5o The saga of Pat and Pat

1:25:00 Never meet your heroes!

1:25:30 Pat doesn’t get Eliot’s promo card tagline: Because muffins can’t have video on them… yet.

1:28:30 Showbiz Tonight on Headline News

1:30:00 TMZ and Charlene Yi

1:31:00 TMZ was the most respectful when Andrew was missing

1:32:00 TMZ’s coverage of Conan

1:33:45 Whatever happened to Eliot’s muffin connection? We won’t find out on-air.

1:32:20 Pat promos Pardcast-a-thon, which is at the Acme Theater this year

1:35:00 Pat will be flying in from London just before the start of Pardcast-a-thon

1:35:30 Ricky Gervais, man of podcasts and movies

1:36:20 Pat needs to know: Why Tabasco Ears?

1:37:30 The changing of the guards

1:38:10 Ooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnn the podcaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa – I say the podcaaaaaa- On the pohhhhhooowwwwwwhaaaaaaoooowwwwhhhhaaaaowwwwoooooooowwwwwwwwwwww —– st.

AK-47 gone, not forgotten