723 – Pat Francis
Intro: A lot of new listeners from the Jon Hamm episode, so Jimmy reminds us he is the host. Reminder: Jimmy Pardo is the host of Never Not Funny.
1:30 Eliot is back with King Kong, and a microphone near him for confusing and bizarre reasons
2:00 Matt needs to be careful about what he jokes about
3:00 Whatever Eliot is doing is not sanctioned
3:30 Pat clunks things up before being introduced
4:20 Jimmy is serious about this control room idea
4:45 Let’s join in Jimmy’s fun!
5:20 Jimmy has an addictive style
5:40 Listen up people, Jimmy makes it look easy, but it’s not!
6:10 “Talk to the snowball!”
6:30 Guess the year of Dan’s KISS tee shirt
7:15 There’s something fishy about that shirt
8:00 Re-enacting WWII as a Nazi
9:30 Pat likes the distressed look of Dan’s shirt
9:50 Jimmy is wearing a busy Rolling Stones tee shirt
10:40 Pat is wearing Freddy Krueger’s sweater
11:00 The incredible difficulties of dressing appropriately for the weather
11:40 Pat’s passive-aggressive daughter
12:00 Pat has the inside scoop on a new website that has weather information
13:00 Jimmy is on day 47 of sty eye
13:05 Matt has information about Jimmy’s sty, even though Jimmy doesn’t want to hear it
13:40 Jimmy’s foot surgery recover was un-effing-bearable
14:00 Oooonnnnn the podcast!
14:15 Starting Episode 723-b
14:50 Eliot gives Jimmy AIDS
15:15 Walking around the room again
15:30 Dan’s drug history
16:00 Crack: the value drug
16:45 Jimmy likes the split screen Eliot is doing with the video
17:00 Star Wars doesn’t hold up as an adult
18:00 The Perfect Storm, a movie about a wave
19:40 Al Gore’s march to failure
20:00 Jimmy’s Ross Perot imitation and other old bits
21:20 Jimmy still does his luge bit
21:40 Jimmy Carter’s post presidency life
23:30 At Matt’s request: Jimmy in concert in Minneapolis
24:30 Room-papering: what it was, and how it worked
25:50 Would you go to a cheese-stick club?
26:20 Pat is a grower, not a shower
26:45 The biggest penis Jimmy ever saw
27:45 Yes or no to a bigger penis?
29:45 Dan’s crazy thermos tipping
30:20 Oooonnnnn the podcast!
30:25 Staring Episode 723-c
30:50 More details about the big crank than you need
31:50 Jimmy will revoke your subscription if you ask Eliot for his audio
33:00 How much dough to show?
33:30 Pat might have an idea that will bring him out of retirement
34:00 Is that a button in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?
34:05 Oooonnnnn the podcast!
34:15 Starting episode 723-d
35:00 Mark Zuckerberg: sympathetic character?
36:00 Don’t miss one line of Never Let Me Go
36:50 “This one time… at the Arclight…”
39:00 Last song people!
39:20 Kevin Cronin’s informercial
40:30 Don’t Forget the Lyrics, a 30 minute 5 minute game show
41:15 Pat’s new game show idea might just cost him his life
42:00 Matt’s celebrity sighting
44:00 The parking at Trashy Lingerie
45:35 “Yeah, so that’s when they hit me with the intervention!”
46:30 Jimmy’s fake-mad is as close to real-mad as he has ever come
47:00 Is Matt afraid that things will fall on him, Steve-O style?
47:20 Dan’s interpretive bottle dance
48:30 The saving grace of the iPod: no need for DJs!
49:15 The Dan Band is not needed at weddings or in movies
50:15 Darius Rucker’s new record is good stuff
51:00 JonBenet and Sarah Palin: a winning combo in Minneapolis
54:50 Pat stops the break for an important request of all listeners
56:10 BREAK TIME!
56:55 Starting episode 723-e
57:00 Pat has theories about skirts, pants, keys, and pockets
57:30 Pat was going to hang the bathroom keys from film reels
58:00 Jimmy has a good excuse for not seeing Pat Benatar with Pat
59:15 Are shoestring potatoes a hillbilly food? Specifically the Planter’s brand. In a canister. A canister; the planter’s brand.
1:01:00 The genius of Mr. Peanut
1:01:50 Pat doesn’t have a ticket, nor does he need one, to see Pat Benatar
1:03:30 Jimmy doesn’t remember talking about patches with Pat on the show
1:04:50 The most awkward 15 minutes of Matt’s life. And it involves Jon Hamm.
1:05:30 Pat will NOT lie about his bed time
1:06:00 The Event: uneventful
1:07:20 “I hope I have egg on my face, because I think that feels nice.”
1:08:00 Back to Pat’s Benatar-stalking
1:09:30 The finer points of Benatar’s videos
1:12:00 Pat’s Dan Band medley
1:13:15 Pat’s new show: The Schizophrenic Detective
1:15:15 Get ready for disappointment!!!
1:18:05 Matt’s nice piece of nursery rhyme business
1:19:30 Pat gets a coincidental craving for Jack-in-the-Box
1:23:5o The saga of Pat and Pat
1:25:00 Never meet your heroes!
1:25:30 Pat doesn’t get Eliot’s promo card tagline: Because muffins can’t have video on them… yet.
1:28:30 Showbiz Tonight on Headline News
1:30:00 TMZ and Charlene Yi
1:31:00 TMZ was the most respectful when Andrew was missing
1:32:00 TMZ’s coverage of Conan
1:33:45 Whatever happened to Eliot’s muffin connection? We won’t find out on-air.
1:32:20 Pat promos Pardcast-a-thon, which is at the Acme Theater this year
1:35:00 Pat will be flying in from London just before the start of Pardcast-a-thon
1:35:30 Ricky Gervais, man of podcasts and movies
1:36:20 Pat needs to know: Why Tabasco Ears?
1:37:30 The changing of the guards
1:38:10 Ooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnn the podcaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa – I say the podcaaaaaa- On the pohhhhhooowwwwwwhaaaaaaoooowwwwhhhhaaaaowwwwoooooooowwwwwwwwwwww —– st.
AK-47 gone, not forgotten