1603 – Shuttering the Windows with Jen Kirkman
Jen Kirkman tippin’ shades
In-studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher
@jenkirkman
Website
00 – Hello indeed! Episode 1603! Jimmy calling in from the car stuck in traffic. 45 to 50 minutes away!! He’s actually 6 minutes away but has to use the bathroom.
He recognizes this bit is stupid.
He took Larry to radio shack?
Matt’s offending Larry.
05 – Matt wonders why Larry is eating bagels in Jimmy’s car.
Jimmy’s coming in live! His sound is worse out of the car in his end and better on ours.
He’s coming! He made it!
Jimmy brought his shutters. He’s got a shutter guy coming.
A mobile shutter guy?!
Jimmy doesn’t know what a mobile shutter guy costs.
Welcome in officially!
Jimmy’s shutter screws seemed to be grooveless. He needs stella to come fix.
Some Oscar chat!
Matt tried to record it but his power went out 2 hours into the show.
10 – Jimmy found it to be really boring. Jack black seems to have saved the opening from being a snooze.
Jimmy says this year was way more self-congratulatory than ever. Matt says it’s because the films weren’t great. You see through the nonsense when you aren’t on board with the movies.
15 – Most of the jokes fell flat but Neil Patrick Harris tried his best to deliver them.
Too cutesy?
The guys talk about the Lady Gaga performance.
I’m young enough to still like movies. Matt’s jaded about them now.
20 – The Glory performance is the popular one. Wonderful song, amazing performance.
Jimmy talks about the Illeana Douglas Living Room show.
25 – Guys try it. I track down cups.
Jimmy talks more about the living room show.
Justin Willman is the host of Cupcake Wars –
30 – Apparently this house is HUGE. They had a shark aquarium.
Jen Kirkman’s here. She has a podcast and a twitter. (I seem Fun or I’m having a good day as Jimmy describes it.)
Jimmy describes this bond villain house again. Indulgent is the word of the day.
Rich people. It’s all rich people.
35 – Jimmy finds Justin Willman great! He loves him. Jimmy talks about Justin’s mystery box.
Jimmy is AMAZED by Justin’s magic.
40 – The Lampshades –
Tom Jones was there!! Jimmy gave him the business.
45 – Jimmy wanted nothing more than to meet Tom Jones. LuPone and Jones in 8 days! Jimmy did bring a CD to be signed.
Jimmy rattled by Tom Jones so he couldn’t remember Scot Robinson’s name.
Jimmy did get his Tom Jones autograph!
Chris Noth was there also and complimented Jimmy. He said he was strikingly handsome. He was the first guy over to Jimmy.
The homeowner made a point to tell Jimmy that he talks to fast. “That’s gotta change!” He walks away. Jimmy sys, “you gotta fuck off.”
50 – Jimmy had great fun.
Jen thinks a huge house is not right. She likes condo life.
Break!
We’re back! Jimmy’s going round the horn!
I brought cookies. Jen passed she’s trying to lose more weight.
Matt mentions the cold shoulder diet.
Jen bought some girl scout cookies from matt. She is a former girlscout. Jen started as a Brownie.
55 – Girl Scout chat. Who found Mrs. Daly??
Matt and Jimmy insist Jen write about finding a dead body with her girl scout friends in the 80s.
My mom cookies are a success!
Break!
60 – We’re back. Skye, the shutter guy, is here.
I go check for a slat in Jimmy’s car.
65 – Eliot still has a vacancy. $1575 still. Everyone thinks Eliot’s building needs a name.
70 – CBS has a trademark on If You Lived Here, You’d Be Home.
Who’s That Lady
Jen Kirkman has a special coming out soon. She can’t say where. She recorded it in Austin TX.
Jen talks about taping her special.
75 – Her special is called “I’m gonna die alone and I feel fine” and will hit around august.
Does Jen have an obsession with Joel Osteen??
Jimmy talks about sort of meeting Joel.
80 – Celebrity sighting! Matt has one. We’re gonna guess.
Matt and Ryan had lunch at Hugo’s and celeb was spotted.
Female! Musician. Matt has a couple of her songs because of Zoe.
Jen thinks Idina Menzel should change her name to Adele Nazeem.
85 – Jen gives advise on dating your childhood crush.
Jen describes Taylor Swift’s Welcome To NY as worse than 9/11.
90 – Jen guesses Miley Cyrus! It is indeed Miley! Jen knows her guitarist.
Jen talks Miley doing backyard sessions doing covers.
Miley Backyard Sessions:
Jolene
Lilac Wine
Look What They’ve Done To My Song
95 – Matt finishes his Miley story. He told her she was great on SNL. She thanked him. Jen says Miley’s body is slammin’.
Apparently, Beverly Hills is a ghost town on Oscar night. Jimmy and fam ended up at Sharkeys
Jen tells a story about Billy Ray Cyrus doing Chelsea Lately. She calls him “sexy.”
Shutter man movement!
We’ll be right back!
We’re back!
100 – RepairBlind.com is the shutter fixer guys!
The price is 85! Jimmy gave him $100!
Jimmy takes a phone call. He has no idea who it was.
105 – Matt goes back to his Billy Ray Cyrus thoughts.
Jimmy does Could’ve Been Me at Karaoke.
Jen wants a good piece of jewelry. She demands that she is given the ring in the song.
Matt and Jimmy ask whether Jen keeps the ring if she ends the relationship.
110 – Steve Sanders did not rape Kelly he stopped a cowboy from raping her.
The Familiare should be the name of Eliot’s building. Jen dropped the word. Jimmy and Matt debate who’s idea it was to name the building that.
115 – Jen not impressed with the Mona Lisa. Matt says she has a smile like the Mona Lisa. She doesn’t appreciate it.
Zoe’s birthday is 9/8. Oliver is a week later.
Jen talks about astrology signs.
Zoe story: She sang the intro to the show. “Ukulele from my head”
Misheard lyrics chat.
Wrapped up like a douche is really revved up like a deuce.
120 – Jen thinks Matt should drop Zoeisms in the intro.
125 – Jen talks about living in NY and going to see Jenny Jones and doing a Cher impression.
Jen’s gonna do the impression for is.
It’s great!
130 – the panel talks prescriptions. Jen Kirkman’s a good person!
She’s back!
Jimmy takes some time to pay tribute to Andrew Koenig.
Check out Batman: Dead End
AK47 Gone but not forgotten.
See you next time!
My pleasure,
Garon/The Beast/Mush Mouth Shy Guy/The Notekeeper/Lazy Queen/Sloth