1017 – Moshe Kasher

 

 

Pardcast.com message board for this episode

Intro

Jimmy is still the host, after 10 seasons

Random safety information

More seatbelt information than you need, some of it possibly accurate and useful

Baby, it’s cold outside

Jimmy’s rare double date with John Ross Bowie

Wonderful seats at LuPone / Patinkin

Coffee in a Carboard Cup

5:00

Microphone issues!

When Eliot sounds better than Jimmy, something is wrong

The solid gold microphone is having issues

HAMMER SLICE! (implied)

Jimmy’s best Paul Anka imitation yet

TECHNICAL ISSUES BREAK

Jimmy’s massage from a young Filipino boy helped him relax

10:00

The broken microphone inspires Jimmy to shit on podcasters who want him as a guest

Matt’s machinery podcast will not have Jimmy as a guest

Patti LuPone sang directly to Jimmy, eyes locked

What can top a great show? Dinner at PF Chang’s!

Matt’s Hunger Games experience

Spoiler info, including Eliot’s reference to some guy named Hitchcock

15:00

Due to the technical difficulties, Matt is no longer the Producer

The Client List poster with Jennifer Love Hewitt: sexy!

Water down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Moshe’s credits, including his book Kasher in the Rye

20:00

The Hunger Games movie, based on a book, hey Moshe wrote a book!

Get the Funk Out

Many Patinkin talk

Trying to get backstage as Martin Sheen

25:00

Jimmy’s goal: never get to Matt

Twilight / Harry Potter / Hunger Games

Spoiler: The Hunger Games is about competetive eating

30:00

Back to Matt’s Hunger Games story

A lot of groundwork is being laid for Matt’s story

Android Matt seemingly does not understand human emotion

[Disclaimer: my lovely wife cries at everything. I even cry at the Subaru Heaven commercial]

What do we do about overly lengthy  movies

Director McG’s resume

The Terminator movies

35:00

BOOK PLUG!

Matt says “on the serious tip” but I don’t know what about, because then my mind exploded

Coffee in a Cardboard Cup

Jimmy demands respect for Patinkin

Moshe on the road!

40:00

Jimmy is jealous of Moshe’s hair

Moshe Kasher: The Jewish Rick Astley

Never Gonna Give you Up

JIMMY PREDICTS RICK ASTLEY IS ON THE NEXT CELEBRITY APPRENTICE

Jimmy does a KILLER Trump impression

Celebrity Apprentice talk

Hitler: small mustache, big personality

Naming your child Adolph Hitler

Swastikas in everyday life

Jimmy has something to say about Draw Something: he’s out!

45:00

Here begins the Great Anti-Dan Katz Draw Something War; the details are too gory for this website

50:00

BOOK PLUG

Actual, live demo of Dan’s Draw Something picture

Jimmy makes an official request for Dan to drop out of Draw Something

55:00

Dan announces he will stop playing with the people in the room

The Great Draw Something War continues

BOOK PLUG

BREAK – BOOK PLUG

1:00:00

BOOK PLUG

During the break, Dan said he is seriously done playing Draw Something with those in the room

Jimmy doesn’t understand the idea of “healing” hurt feelings

Jimmy’s defecation euphamism confused Matt

Moshe has a startling story about group masturbation to gay porn; laws may have been broken

BOOK PLUG

1:05:00

Moshe and tropical island phone sex lines

What happened to Moshe’s $1500 in bar mitzvah money? Hint: see above

Moshe’s parents are deaf. Or def.

“It was a strange childhood”

1:10:00

Penthouse > Victoria’s Secret Catalog > JC Penney Catalog

Moshe’s Basketball Diaries sex education

Back to insulting Dan’s Draw Something skills

Dan clarifies that he does not do “one-handed” Draw Something

Dexter, masturbation, and Dexter’s sister’s GQ.com ‘tude

“Cooze” is the new C-word (if that’s how you spell it)

What’s in Ellen’s CD player?

BOOK PLUG

Moshe’s book is pretty dark

1:15:00

Moshe on the Bill Handel show

Jimmy is the secret Jimmy Fallon booker

BOOK PLUG

Dan seems really hurt, so let’s talk about his Draw Something skills again

Kasher’s great “I no do that kind of call” callback

1:20:00

Dan was stung a little, but it’s ok, so Jimmy continues to insult him

Matt has some info “on the serious tip”

Matt has constructive criticism for Dan, because he has not yet taken enough shit about Draw Something

Never Not Funny is The Blind Side

Moshe sums up Jimmy and Matt’s feelings about Dan

The Podkatz is doing very well, apparently all due to Jimmy

Moshe loves everyone in the room, except Eliot

BREAK AGAIN because Moshe had to leave

BOOK PLUG

Jimmy loves that Moshe’s book is legit, not some self-published bullshit

1:25:00

Dan Kaufman of The Myoclonic Jerk podcast joins in

Kaufman obsesses about stiars and parking

Jimmy will be on The Myoclonic Jerk podcast; theme: failure

Jimmy was very nice to the lowly Dan Kaufman when they met

1:30:00

Jimmy lost his balls after 9/11

Dan Kaufman, Eliot, and Gary Lucy are the best at Draw Something

The Draw Something millionaires

Draw Something on iPhone vs. iPad

Time for Movie Katz!

Middle-aged trivia forgetfulness is a REAL THING, FOR REAL, THEY SPEAK THE TRUTH!!!!!!

BOOK PLUG

1:35:00

Dan kicks it off with Transformers [I will avoid the temptation to document every. single. move. of the Movie Katz game]

After a short round of Movie Katz, Dan and Dan explain what Myoclonic Jerk means

Matt starts with Travolta

Jimmy is so excited that he demands sexual favors

Is Mac Davis fair?

1:40:00

I Believe in Music

Jimmy starts with Patrick Swayze

Jimmy sets himself up for failure with Billy Jay

Matt tries to make Dan Katz feel better, but probably failed

BOOK PLUG

AK-47 gone, not forgotten