2904 – Strapping in with Laurie Kilmartin

Laurie Kilmartin

Find the show at NeverNotFunny.com
In studio notes by Garon Cockrell
Editing and additional notes by Darryl Asher


00 Hello!

Welcome in! 2904! Jimmy wins!

Jimmy talks about evenings and late evenings – https://wgntv.com/weather/how-do-you-define-daytime-and-evening-times-in-a-weather-forecast/

Matt went to the mountains this weekend and talks about a noon opening pool and the people who showed up with a speaker blasting 311 and Sublime.

Knuckle pop via face for Jimmy during Matt’s story!

Matt talks more about the house he and family stayed at. There was a binder.

Jimmy talks about his office not getting the AC as well as the rest of the house. No one was home when the HVAC guy showed up today.

10 – Matt talks about discovering his potential claustrophobia.

No touching, or sex, in the Champagne Room.

Next Fucking Level on Reddit.

Talking Jimmy’s trip under his house to run that ethernet cable. It’s VERY tiny.

20 – https://upgradedhome.com/why-doesnt-california-have-basements/

Basement talk!

25 – Jimmy and Oliver went to see Pat Benatar this weekend! Ran into some listerners, including Jeff!

Brief biography talk – Augusten Burrough – Running With Scissors


Jimmy talks more about the Pat Benatar show.

30 – The Starlight Bowl has a weird snack/drink line situation.

Pat was fantastic according to Jimmy.

Jimmy and Oliver were the first car out of the lot!

Danielle was at the Weezer/Fall Out Boy/Green Day concert.

35 – Jimmy is seeing Elton John next November.


45 – Jimmy thinks we’re gonna get a Lifetime Achievement Award.

Isaac sent us some soaps! Etsy.com/shop/soapolionow

50 – Eliot talks about his soap habits.

More mail! This is from Andrew Baker.

It’s a Hillary Clinton action figure.

55 – When will our guest notice Hillary?

We’ll see what happens!

We’ll be right back!

60 – We’re back!

Laurie Kilmartin is with us! Jimmy talks about The Jackie and Laurie Show.

Laurie and Jimmy talk about canceling dates to protest events IE Texas.

1h5m – Jimmy said gash to our delight/horror.

Laurie talks about Gutty’s club and the “Clean Comedy Challenge.”

In this competition, there was a covid outbreak and 3 comics died.

1h15m – 10 hangers for 25 cents!

Covid is the #1 killer of cops right now?

Dirty Carson is here!

Talking Vaccine boosters.

1h20m – If Texas is so bad why are so many people leaving California to go there?

Matt says: They aren’t.

“Trolly Takes with Laurie and Jimmy”

Talking breaks from podcast/vacations etc.

The Cellar in NYC locked customers inside during FLOODING, to make sure everyone paid. https://www.dailydot.com/irl/comedy-cellar-nyc-flooding-tiktok/

1h25m – Competing Ideas for check drops?

Eliot: Pay the bill to get your phone back.

Matt: electronic things at the table

Garon: Prepay. Also cuts down on drunks.

Laurie: Ipad/square at the table

1h30m – SwingSet is good for something!

Talking merch/posters/etc.

1h35m – A 2-inch ruler as merch?!

Talking weird comedy merch. Teeth?! Eyeballs?!

Jimmy insists on giving a better t-shirt!

Pardcocks! (is not happening).

1h40m – Laurie talks about the C-word and traveling with her books.

Jimmy talks about the weird times of getting a standing ovation but selling no merch. “you just stood for me!”

Talking websites and where to share dates.

We’ll be right back!

Category: Chef Accessories

1h45m – We’ll be right back!

Listener Zach brought us some food!

Question is: Believe it or not, a classic chef hat only worn by experienced chefs, called a Tuk, has 100 folds in it, however, what do these folds mean?

Hair talk!

My answer is equating to months of experience.

Eliot says the number of ways to cook an egg.

Matt’s guess is 100 Hours of Experience.

Laurie says chef suicides after Gordon Ramsey

Jimmy says Hours of Schooling.

1h55m – We are ruling out Laurie’s but Jimym hopes she’s right.

Matt talks about eggs spray.

2h – Eliot gets the correct answer! Full results below!

Laurie talks about her upcoming album!

Jimmy talks about a reference in his liner notes in the Chicago album relating to Trump.

Carter Gash!

Laurie’s album is called Corset. Cristela Alonzo came over and helped put Laurie in a Corset for a photoshoot!

2h5m – The album comes out in late October!

Jimmy tells a quick home story. He gave Oliver a raspberry thumbs down immediately to whatever news Oliver tried to tell him. He still doesn’t know what the news is.

2 inch ruler, carter gash, pardcock shuttlecock coming soon.

Talking Laurie’s son and Oliver playing Dance Dance Revolution together.

2h10m – Thanks Laurie!
See you next time!

BREAKING NEWS: Laurie IS DISTANTLY related to Paul Gilmartin!

Trivia Results:
Category: Chef Accessories
Question:. Believe it or not, a classic chef hat only worn by experienced chefs, called a Tuk, has 100 folds in it, however, what do these folds mean?

Garon: Months of experience (6 pts)
Eliot: 100 ways to cook an egg (20 pts) – Correct answer
Matt: Hours of Experience (6 pts)
Laurie: Number of chef’s who killed themselves after seeing Gordon Ramsey (9 pts)
Jimmy: Hours of Schooling ( pts)

We have a winner!

The answer is: 100 ways to cook an egg.

My pleasure,

Garon/The Beast/Mush Mouth Shy Guy/The Notekeeper/Lazy Queen/Sloth