1002 – Dave Holmes
Jimmy’s furrow-browed self-conciousness
Matt’s new nickname, but only behind the scenes
Early appearance of Dice’s lady
The Dead Eyes of Hochberg
Did Robyn lip-synch on SNL?
Jimmy’s attendence of gay shows
What Jimmy does in bed while Danielle is asleep
Jimmy’s weather and traffic update
When the Rain Becomes a Part of You -Robert Lamb
Snowman vs. Rain Man
Jimmy’s insurance needs
Belknap as a verb
Thank God Dave can talk now!
How long since Dave’s been on a full episode?
Dave has a contrary opinion about Robyn’s SNL appearance
Rob Delaney’s Twittering and name-thievery
What should Matt name his son?
Jimmy has a message for Rob Delaney: listen up Delaney!
Jimmy is really mad at Matt about his OCD cat toy, or he is like an athelete
Dave Holmes, the bearded gentleman
Dave is old, or at least getting there
Dave is writing a book
Matt is trying to avoid squirrel-eyes
Matt reprimands Eliot’s thumb
Never Not Funny branded foam thumbs: the next big thing
Or, according to Matt, maybe not so big
Matt’s sleep situation
Zoe: spoiled childed, due to bed size
Jimmy is a journalist, like Jimmy Dore
The off-ramp to Jimmy’s glasses
Matt needs a fantasy basketball name
Dave’s love/hate relationship with costume parties
Back to Matt’s sleep incident, featuring screaming, bad memory, flying headphones, and mistaken identity
Audio emergency that is not really an audio emergency, that maybe should have been ignored
Matt’s job #1: PRODUCE. THE. SHOW.
Elf on the Shelf: the greatest invention in the history of forever
Eliot risks the wrath of Jimmy by asking an innocent question
Matt envies Jimmy’s elf
Elf on the Shelf will NOT move himself!
Matt has ruined Christmas for Zoe
Energy / alchoholic drinks
Dan is Jimmy’s unwanted AA sponsor
Jimmy gets a drunk-dial from his dad
Drunk angry golf
Jimmy was not a fun drunk
Dave’s mom’s Michael Jackson related drunk message
“We know it’s not Meat Loaf”
BREAK (This doesn’t really count as a Darryl shoutout)
Look at this awesome brushed-twill Never Not Funny hat!
Demonstrating the Stallone-in-a-bottle bottle
Stallone-in-a-bottle holds a press conference
Jimmy calls out Dave at the 7-11
Dave Holmes IS MTV!
Total Request Live documentary is in the works
You must see the new video intro, and you can upgrade from audio-only for just $5!
A note from Darryl: SPEND THE FIVE BUCKS ON THE VIDEO! IT’S WORTH IT EVEN IF YOU ONLY WATCH A FEW!
Matt totally kills Stallone-in-a-bottle with a clunky My Dinner with Andre reference
Eliot’s email’s are ruder than Jimmy’s terse e-mails
Contest announcment: name the items in the video opening
Listen to The Myopic Jerk, Dan Kaufman’s podcast
Dave hates Jimmy’s drink
The sex lives of The Brady Bunch
The curly-haired 70s
Make sure your suede shoes fit properly before buying them
Jerry O’Connor, leader of the pack, ruiner of childhood
Dave’s awesome surfing therapist
Matt needs to go to therapy. Or maybe just learn to surf.
Taj Monjardo: alpha male
Camo parachute pants
Dave is stunned about Jimmy buying shorts for Dan
Jimmy finds his shoes, proving he is qualified to be his own intern
Don’t exaggerate your shoe size, you’re only lying to yourself
Jimmy shows off his generosity
Back to the video opening contest
There are 34 items in the new video opening
CONSISTENT WORDING is VITAL, people
The collectibility of Beanie Babies
Small Wonder fanfic
Star Dates with Butch Patrick
“Has-been” shows and autograph sales
The Pat Francis autograph-seeking method
What’s Jimmy’s price?
Dave’s MTV party appearances: demeaning but lucrative
How Dave made it through his last MTV party
Closing with lotsa aughts
Come on! This has been a fun time!
AK-47 gone, not forgotten
IN-STUDIO NOTES BY DAN KATZ
0 – Jimmy looks concerned at the table a lot. Matt is scared. Matt is the squirrel. Did Robyn lip sync on SNL? It’s raining outside.
5 – Jimmy loves the rain. Rain Man was a documentary about George Snarsky who tried to make a snow man out of rain. George Snarsky was Jimmy’s old insurance. Jimmy has trouble opening his Vitamin Water Zero – GoGo.
10 – Jimmy and Dave disagree over whether or not Robyn lip syncing. What name should Matt name his kid? Johnny Belknap.
15 – Jimmy’s got issues with Rob Delaney’s twittering. Jimmy plays with Velcro. The guys talk about Dave’s beard which came and went.
20 – Dave is writing a book. Matt talks about his sleep situation.
25 – Matt needs a good fantasy basketball name.
30 – Matt actually tells the sleep situation story. Brief audio emergency.
35 – Jimmy still loves Elf On The Shelf. Eliot interrupts Jimmy to his wrath.
40 – There have been some Elf On The Shelf dramas as of late.
45 – Dave and Jimmy have new fridges. Jimmy’s dad drunk dialed him.
50 – Jimmy the angry drunk. Golf and weddings. More drunk parents stories from everyone.
0 – plugs for the NNF hat and the stallone-in-a-bottle.
5 – stallone-in-a-bottle hangs out for a while.
10 – There’s a contest for the video feed opening.
15 – The guys discuss buying shoes. Jimmy feels bad about abandoning his friend in high school.
20 – Dave sees a surfing therapist.
25 – Jaclar sneakers.
30 – Dave loves weird internet shit like Small Wonder fan fiction.
35 – The guys talk about fandom and conventions.
40 – Dave talks about doing MTV conventions. Great money. Most demeaning thing ever.