NeverNotNotes

1412 – Immersing Yourself with Laurie Kilmartin

Laurie Kilmartin enjoys the fragrant aroma of the Never Not Funny Studio

Laurie Kilmartin enjoys the fragrant aroma of the Never Not Funny Studio

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In-studio notes by Garon Cockrell

NNF 1412 – Laurie Kilmartin
@anylaurie16
www.kilmartin.com

00 – I press a button and get his beverage! Diet Tea with Ginsinge. Soft or hard G. Matt’s words have turned to stone according to Jimmy.

Yak Yak was ahead of the curve just didn’t know what to do with it!

14-12! Laurie Kilmartin is joining us! She hasn’t been here since episode 818!

Join the Players Club! No more VIP though. Limited edition all gone!

Chair is going! I guess we need a new studio that doesn’t affect the chair spin.

Jimmy had a great weekend in Dayton, OH. He celebrated Record Store Day.

05 – A video of the price as right fail horn set to the 9/11 footage made jimmy laugh, he admits. Jimmy recount the story of witnessing a motorcycle t-boning a car on highland. He saw the guy fly over the car. He was talking to Pat Francis at the time.

10 – My Kickstarter! https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1437868841/pop-culture-beast-20

General Thanks was jimmy’s boss in the war. I go through my KS rewards. Jimmy talks about How I Met Your Mother.

Dancing With the Stars cast – http://abc.go.com/shows/dancing-with-the-stars/cast-announcement

20 – Bird chat. Jimmy met the devil Georgia. He went by Johnny then.

Jimmy’s smart mouth got him in the brig more than once.

30 – Jimmy got his mom a new car! Another Toyota. Dirty knees!

35 – Why are you revving your engines bikers? Go sell your meth out of a truck!

Jimmy does a little elvis! He did a decent Shatner yesterday during the impression game.

40 – Dan Katz is gonna babysit Oliver!

Head over to Pardcast.com and sign up for the Players Club! 591Rock.com and NeverNotFunnyPodcast.com.

Jimmy opens the floor to questions. Eliot mentions the guests on Players Club are fan favorites! Jimmy confirms they suck at promoting their own shows.

Where is our guest?! Jimmy thinks he may have given her the wrong time.

Check out my kickstarter and check out The Players Club!

We’ll be back!

45 – We’re back! I’m here. Eliot is in a costume like he belongs in a green day cover band. Laurie thinks he looks adorable.

Laurie live tweeted her dad’s deathbed. It was accidental. The Daily Mail did an article about her dad.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2568963/Laurie-Kilmartin-live-tweeting-cancer-stricken-fathers-death-gets-thousands-followers.html

Jimmy confirms Laurie is not related to Paul GILmartin.

50 – Jimmy was able to pull Iron Man’s secret identity demands credit.

Laurie says Jimmy could be 80-90 year old man. Jimmy has a small part in Adam Carolla’s movie Rode Hard.

Jimmy was at Wiley’s in Dayton. He does not work the Funny Bone chain.

Jimmy asks Laurie if she’s done coke. She hasn’t but has been around people that have been

55 – Apparently you can get 10-20 lines out of an 8-Ball! Depends on cut and how often you use. http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_many_lines_in_an_eight_ball_of_cocaine

Laurie talks about Jimmy telling her not to work the crowd because he does.

This might be the kid that Laurie is talking about: http://www.dailybulletin.com/arts-and-entertainment/20140306/ontario-12-year-old-to-perform-host-stand-up-comedy-night-at-empire-night-club

Laurie has a 7 year old too.

Lots of baggy jeans in Jimmy’s neighborhood. They live in the flats of Baldwin hills.

60 – His neighbor parked right at the edge of his driveway to the point that it is difficult to get in or out.

Laurie says to put his garbage cans in the spot where the guy parks so he can’t park there.

Jimmy actually talked to someone who was parked at his spot. He asked them to pull up a bit so he could put his trash out. They’re response was a super aggressive, “We’re not staying long!”

Laurie wonders if the African-Americans in Jimmy’s neighborhood are cheering on the parking fight between the two whites. Jimmy doesn’t think so because they don’t know there is a fight due to his passive-aggressive pussiness.

Jimmy does a little Rockwell.

65 – Laurie says the wrong parent died first. She loved hanging out with her dad. He even went on the road with her a few times.

Jimmy asks what cool dams they saw. Matt says surely the great cooley damn. Jimmy scolds him for using cooley saying it is offensive.

Jimmy brings up Laurie’s swimming. She can’t do it much because of taking her son to school. He is in a Spanish Immersion school. She thinks he’ll run New Mexico one day and she’ll be like Jenny Churchill (Winston’s mother.) Jennie Jerome! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winston_churchill

70 – GH chat!! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Jerome Jimmy just wants one line on GH. Also Mad Men.

William DeVry – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_deVry

75 – I5 Drive chat. Driving up the 5 towards the bay area. There is an area affectionally called Cowschwitz (or DaCow) where cows are all together.

Jimmy talks about learning people are calling an open mic night as a Microphone or a Mic. “You don’t wanna go to Open Faced Mic? I do!”-Jimmy

Eliot’s pulling focus going hand held for some reason. Jimmy uses “ficking.” Jimmy mixes it up!

80 – One of the Zucker brothers is going to be at the Airplane screening! David Zucker maybe. http://cinefamily.ticketmob.com/show.cfm?id=26808&cart
Laurie and Jimmy talk about a comedian they both can’t stand. He takes longer sets. Disrupts the show holding court at the bar. Gets people bumped, etc. ASSHOLE. The guy is completely oblivious to what’s going on. He got a standing ovation in the middle of a set from like four tables. He thinks he is famous, is currently on a show, but isn’t famous.

85 – Laurie’s kid is also taking piano lessons. Jimmy’s in the market for a condo for his mom.

“Obviously when we die, Oliver will get the grand piano, but until then we want to buy him an upright.” – Danielle’s Mom.

90 – there is a lot to boyscouts. Jimmy doesn’t think Laurie’s son will have time for it. Oliver’s about to go from Tiger to Bob Cat. Laurie asks if the scoutmaster ever made Jimmy uncomfortable given the history. Jimmy says no.

There’s always a Scout Master and a Priest around.

Loud people outside!

Laurie also does the 7 Minute workout!

95 – Jimmy and Laurie compare their 7 Minute Apps. Jimmy explains a treadmill to Matt.

Steve Prefontaine – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_Prefontaine

100 – We’re done! Jimmy takes the responsibility for the first 30 of Laurie’s lateness. Her 12 minutes are infuriating.

Laurie is a SouthWest A Lister. Jimmy calls Jet-Blue and Virgin Airlines the best.

Laurie! A Joy!

Jimmys going down

We’re out!

My pleasure,

Garon/The Beast/Mush Mouth Shy Guy